Challenges and Changes Pt2

September 17: Surgery Day

Surgery day arrived early (4am early) on September 17. Dave had to be at the hospital by 5am to check in for surgery that we were told would start at 7:30am. We were surprisingly calm and unworried when we arrived at the hospital to check in. We both likely anxious, but it wasn’t coming through. We both just felt that things would work out in the best way they could and we were prepared for whatever that meant.

We arrived in post-op (day surgery ward – which through me a bit) at about 5:40 or so and they began to prep Dave for surgery. Blood tests, MRI, questions, personal directive, all of that sort of thing. He had a scheduled MRI at 6:40 prior to surgery so that the Doctors could see what they were working with and what needed to be removed while they had his skull open.

However, there were delays. That day Dave’s veins were being difficult. The Lab Tech drawing blood had a problem getting a vein to provide the sample and had to poke multiple times to get what was required. The MRI people also had issues getting a vein for the contrast required for the MRI. Then Dave admits to falling asleep in the MRI, which could have caused a shadow to appear like an additional tumor growth.

During this time I went back to my office, which is on the same campus as the hospital where the procedures were taking place, to put away some of the extra things we were packing around for after surgery, and my own work related items. When I came back they were still prepping Dave for surgery and told me that he would be going straight in and not returning to the pre-op area. I asked if I could see him before he went into the OR and was asked to wait in the waiting area while the determined where he was.

About 15 minutes later I approached the counter again only to have the girl who was supposed to take me into the OR holding area say “Oh there you are” like I hadn’t been waiting where she told me to wait. That wait had made me extremely anxious, nervous, and just a little freaked out as I hadn’t been able to say to Dave “talk to you after surgery.” Which doesn’t sound like much, but sets the tone for what I was expecting.

I did get to see him before they took him into the OR. Apparently, he wasn’t near as nervous, or they had drugged him already, as I had been. We said our see you laters and he was taken into the OR. Dave went into the OR about an hour after the time we had anticipated, about 8:30am.

I stress over things when left without a direction or something to focus my mind on. I know this about myself, I know when I need to be busy and when I can be in the quiet places. This was not one of those times.

As my office is only a 5 minute or less walk from the OR I went back to do a bit of work to take my mind of the worry of what was happening. This apparently, isn’t what normal people would do and caused some in my office to be worried about my mental state.

I am a Capricorn, I tend to over think things and pick them apart until they are mush and no longer useful. I stress over things when left without a direction or something to focus my mind on. I know this about myself, I know when I need to be busy and when I can be in the quiet places. This was not one of those times.

I answered a few emails, packed up a few things as we were in the middle of people moving offices, and worked with a few students who happened to check on me that morning. Mostly tried to keep busy so that I wouldn’t be clock checking and worrying.

At about 10:30 I received a call from the tracking line number that I was given that I could call for updates. It was Wendy, a liaison assigned to Dave and me to provide updates. I had a little moment of panic over this call, but she calmed me by saying that she was just providing an update and that everything was going exceptionally well.

Wendy indicated that she had been into see Dave and that she had talked to him. He had responded that everything was going better than he had expected. This was an exceptional relief. With this type of surgery there is no normal process. Much of it is trial as they working through the testing of the brain around the areas that they are wanting to remove. She said that I was lucky because I was assigned a liaison, which doesn’t happen for everyone.

He had responded that everything was going better than he had expected.

The timing of her call was really good, as I was expecting the rest of the immediate family to arrive within 30 minutes of the call. This included Dave’s brother, mother, father and step mother. I knew they would want to know what was going on and was not relieved that I had something to tell them to also set them at ease.

His brother cried when I told them that everything was going well and that Dave was speaking clearly to the liaison and I had just received an update.

Side note: The Adams family has a bit of a history of surprising doctors with healing things that are not usually healed easily. Remember this as it is important later on.

Dave’s dad and step-mom showed up about 30 minutes after his mom and brother and I repeated the news and watched them have much the same reaction. We talked a bit about what was going on before I got hungry and led everyone downstairs for something to eat. Yes, I know my way around…I do work there.

After lunch, I left them and went back to my office. I had asked a colleague to handle a meeting, and needed the distraction again as I was now trying to manage other people’s emotional responses (not a good idea, but being an empath is something I need to be cautious of doing) and was starting to get nervous again.

We had been told that the surgery would likely last about 4 hours. At this point we were coming up to or had just past this point. I had forgotten to ask if that mean from the time they opened his cranium to closing or just once they got inside his brain.

I had forgotten to ask if that mean from the time they opened his cranium to closing or just once they got inside his brain.

I was able to catch the last half of the meeting, which was great for me. I did a few more packing things and asking a student who had come to see me if I could meet with them tomorrow when I received the second call from Wendy. This was at about 2:30pm. Additionally, one of my other students had come to check to make sure I was doing okay…I have wonderful students that I support! Amazing really. I gave her an indication that everything was okay, finished with the first student, and went off back to the waiting area for day surgery (still seemed odd to be in day surgery).

This was the hardest waiting I have done, and probably the worst…should have stayed and helped move my stuff. Closing and transition to recover took almost an hour, and my nerves were beginning to get a bit frazzled. I had also been up for a very long time and the stress was beginning to wear. Watching the update screen and not knowing what the codes were didn’t help much either, nor knowing that my kids needed to be picked up from school, but I couldn’t provide them with a great update.

The third call from Wendy came in somewhere around 3:20, Dave was out of post-op, awake and doing fine. They were preparing to move him to his assigned room on the 11th floor in the main building. I asked Wendy if he was already in the room and was told he was.

I just about ran of our surgeon, Dr. Kelly, as I was racing from the waiting area to where Dave was supposed to be, I should have been calmer as he hadn’t yet made it to that room. We received the update, which was mostly good news.

They had been able to remove almost all of the tumor, at the time I wasn’t given a percentage. That Dave had been awake during the entire removal process and able to speak without as much of the language impact as they had been expecting. The badish part of the news was that the initial pathology looked like the tumor was indeed a Glioblastoma (however, further testing needed to be done to be absolutely sure) and that there had appeared to be a new tumor growth that they were not able to remove.

I had been told that Dr. Kelly had another emergency surgery to perform, so I didn’t keep him with more questions, not that I had any that were coming to me at the time, so we let him get back to what he needed to be doing. I knew that he would be following up with Dave everyday and I could ask questions later.

The relief for me was somewhat over shadowed by the need to see Dave in the flesh and talk to him myself. However, empath me was being overwhelmed by all of the other emotions from those around me so I wasn’t able to think quite clear enough to ensure I was the first one into his room when he was settled. Left that to his brother, who was way more anxious about seeing Dave.

I went to call the children who were just about to be picked up from school to let them know that everything had gone well and that their dad was awake, and apparently talking. This was not what we had been told to expect.

Oh by the way – my children have been absolutely amazing through this entire process. They have been calm and acting like the children they are making everything a little more bearable.

The kids were really happy that things had gone well and that their dad was talking. That was all that mattered to them, that he was still going to be able to talk to them. I have to say that I think all of those that were following our goings on let out a collective sigh of relief that the surgery was over and had gone well.

I was able to see Dave at about 4:30. He was indeed talking, with some word finding challenges, and generally in good spirits. Yes, still high as a kite from the drugs they had fed him to control the pain and swelling just after surgery, but feeling like he had won the lottery as he could still talk to us and respond to the nurses.

I had to run home to get ear plugs for Dave as he had a roommate who I was concerned would not let him sleep. While I did this I also stopped to talk to the kids and hug for their dad.

The ear plugs actually caused more problems as he could hear the movement of the skull when he breathed (it was too crackly).

I stayed at the hospital until just after 10pm that day. It was a good thing as the hospital staff was still having problems drawing blood and getting good IV sights. One of the attempts triggered a seizure episode that the nurses wouldn’t have recognized had I not been there and might have ended up worse than it was.

Thank goodness that was the last one we have had since.

Dave recovered exceptionally well in hospital and went home Thursday night. Yep, only stayed in two nights before they kicked him out. Pain was being managed by extra strength Tylenol, yep that’s it. He handled brain surgery better than he handled getting his wisdom teeth removed.

More to come as I tell you about the next fourish weeks.