Another first we got to experience without a loved one occurred in June. Daxen’s grade 6 farewell or graduation. At no point in our lives do we expect to reach milestones with our Children without one parent. Not really anyway. Some make that choice, but we didn’t get to choose. Not that we are in a bad place. No we are actually in a great place.
It was however the first school milestone that we really got to celebrate in the last 2 years. I am so very proud of my boys and how they approach each new thing we experience. While there might be sadness we acknowledge it and keep moving forward. We find the joy in the event and focus there rather than on the sadness. We take our moments to acknowledge any feelings that come up and then return to the present to enjoy the moment.
It’s hard when you are proud and can’t share that with the person who helped create the person you are proud of, but you share with those you can. The event was also the first one that parents were able to attend in person in 2 years. It was exciting to see how the kids have adapted and how things still are much the same as they once were.
Daxen had an amazing school year. Both kids did really. There were challenges but they managed well and connected with friends and teachers. Daxen really stepped up and started to show the kind of teen I think he’s going to be, hopefully. He connected immediately with his peers and became a leader within his peer group. Comments from his teacher were always stellar and his friends always missed him when he was gone.
Each teacher, at the event handed out certificates to their students. Daxen’s teacher went above and beyond with a special handshake for each of the students. I could tell Daven was nervous about it but they managed with his teacher making a comment about them failing at a certain point in the execution. It was very special. I also noticed where and when kids who either had been at the school for a long time or were highly regarded were called on. The applause for Dax and his class were much louder than others it was both strange and so very warming. It was at that point I wished Dave could have been there.
However, I also felt that he was closer in energy that day then he had been in a while. I know that he is proud of our oldest child who is turning out to be a lovely young person. We’ve given him the foundation he needs to be successful in Junior high. He is so excited about going next year. I suspect we will see some anxiety peek through as we get closer.
He will be taking the city bus to school so has already asked questions about that and we haven’t even really started Summer break. It might even workout that I can drop him off in the mornings and he would only then need to get home on his own.
Seth had a great finish to his grade 2 year. While he struggled through the first half with focus and effort he did so much better in the second half of the year. While his grades weren’t bad to begin with I knew that he was capable of so much more. And he proved it with the last half of his school year.
While he struggled to connect with his classmates he started to figure it out. He is very strongly opinionated and stubborn in what and how he wants to operate which puts him in situations of conflict, he is learning compromise. He is smart and started to figure out how to show that rather then being bored and causing trouble.
He had amazing teachers who worked with him on regulation techniques and provided positive reinforcement for good behavior. He’s also learning that talking to me helps and I don’t always get mad when things go wrong or behavior is not what it should be. I hope to build on this over the summer.
This summer is busy or at least it feels that way compared with others we have experienced. It likely isn’t but with being back at work it feels like it will go very quickly.
July starts with a trip for me to Dallas and the boys to Grandmas at the Lake for ten days. I had hoped to take the kids on this Dallas trip so they could meet my fiancé but their passports were expiring Julys and there was a very high chance they would not clear security as they want 6 months time before expiry in the passports. I tried to get them but with the backlog and reduced capacity of staff and people in the passport office I was unsuccessful. The docs have now been mailed and I hope to see all of that back sometime before school starts, maybe.
After I pick up the kids we have a camping event with Dave’s step-sisters and dad before going North for Dave’s cousin’s wedding. We will be skipping our normal Wapiti camping trip this year to visit my parents for a little over a week before going home. This puts us in August.
While August doesn’t have anything specific planned I know it will go exceptionally fast. Work will be busy, the kids will be at their old day home for some of this time and playing with their friends. I’m sure we’ll do something fun but also know it will go by so very fast.
School starts again Sept 1 and that weekend we are expecting a guest. This will be the first physical meeting between my fiancé and the kids. Though we all talk so much it’s like he’s just away for work rather than living in a different country. While we have sad moments we are having so many more happy and exiting ones.
Life doesn’t stop when you lose someone important but we have to choose to move with it. We have to choose to see the happy in our experiences. Acknowledge the sad, be sad, but move forward. I never expected to find someone that I want to share this journey with this quickly. Nor did I expect that it would be this deep and easy and everything I would have hoped or dreamed.
But that’s a different story I’m not get ready to share here.
The Adams-Schlag Family 