Birthdays & Valentines

Things are settling into a routine that I am finding very comforting. Sometimes you don’t realize the amount of stress that you carry to get everything done until someone else takes over some of the things that need to be done. Of course what has been taken over are the tasks that I really don’t enjoy doing, other than cooking.

January, February, March and May are birthday months for us. Adults then kids. Our February birthday celebration is on the 14th which is also Valentine’s Day. I have never really felt that Valentine’s Day is the only day that you should express your love for those who are important to you, it really should be everyday. I find it to be a commercialized holiday and that has always bothered me.

So that makes celebrating a birthday on the same day a bit weird. One, going out for an evening out on that day is complicated by all of the people who use that day to do something extra special for their loved one(s) and those who are in new relationships to be out as well. So, not only do you fight with finding a place that isn’t over packed, but with things being a bit more pricey due to the commercialization of the day.

It’s super special that someone is born on a holiday, but sometimes it can cause a few more challenges.

So first things when in a relationship are usually done in a bit of an overboard manner, and I might have done that this year, just a little. It might be that this amazing person who has joined our lives didn’t get the love that I think they should have over the last number of years, or just that I felt the need to ensure that they feel appreciated. Okay, I know stuff shouldn’t do that, but sometimes it’s what you have.

For my birthday in January, we went out for a really nice meal and to a musical. Which is something I enjoy doing, but didn’t have the opportunity previously to do. It was a very nice, relaxed and enjoyable experience and one of the better birthdays that I have had. The kids are just getting into the stage where they realize that they should be doing something for birthdays and other holidays. Previously this was done for them without much input.

This year has been a bit different and created some challenges as they start to see that many of the things that have been done for birthdays has been things they wanted to do and not necessarily what the adult wanted to do, but to have them included it was done anyway. The young one in particular is starting to see this, which is amazing.

Celebrating a birthday on Valentine’s Day was strange for me. I wanted to do something special, but felt going out was just going to cause me far to much anxiety due to the number of people already out. Yes, I do have anxiety in social environments. I always have. Though I mask it well, it’s why I don’t tend to go out to bars or other places like that often. Those that know me well see this and understand it, the rest of you wouldn’t necessarily notice.

So we stayed home, we gave Cory our presents over the week of his birthday. We made food that he had been craving (wings, fries, gravy, cheese) and really did have an enjoyable day. However, the second gift that he got didn’t work the way it was supposed to and fixing it was becoming challenging to understand.

Cory has gotten into flying remote controlled aircraft. Planes mostly. So we had purchased one that was second hand, third hand to us, that was the model that he was wanting to buy. However, something went wrong with the plane and how things worked and instead of being able to fly, it would just crash.

Frustrating to say the least, but also a hit to your confidence in your ability to fly when you know that you can fly. As we had given this one to him early he spend the the 5 days he had it prior to his birthday trying to figure out what had gone wrong. Testing, crashing, fixing broken parts, etc.

As we couldn’t figure out what was going on, and I wanted him to have a larger plane to fly I sent him to the store to get the other one he had his eye on, which new shouldn’t have any of the other issues.

Getting something second or third hand, you never can really know what was done or which parts might be causing problems. Cory didn’t give up on the other plane, but now had something that once put together just flew. Which the new one did.

What this also did was provide something to base a bit more research off of and led to the understanding of what was happening with the other plane. Which was that one system wasn’t recognizing that something was reversed. So when safe mode was engaged it didn’t see the reversal so corrected things in the way it thought was right, but was the opposite and therefore wrong. Causing crashes.

Once that was figured out the plane flew, and flew properly!!

So now Cory has two helicopters and three planes. We really need to get the garage cleared out so he has a place to store these items as they are not small.

Too bad we ended up in the deep freezer again with our weather.

There were a few other presents that were given too, which I felt I needed to do for a few different reasons. Firsts of new things can be hard, emotional and just exciting.

In addition to birthdays, we have seen a change in the youngest child in February. I don’t know what happened, but he has found his feet again. He is so much better behaved at school and even more helpful at home. We can’t entirely pinpoint what changed, but it was a night and day shift over a weekend. I know he will have bad days, but at this point I have the kid back that I have been trying to raise and be this way from the start.

I am proud of him for figuring this out, but still confused as to what happened. I can only attribute it to stability that we have now. It feels so much nicer to reinforce behavior that he is exhibiting that is positive, rather than that kind of behavior that I have to constantly correct. AND he feels better about himself and it shows.

I am very relieved that this has come about, as I was not sure where we were going to end up with that one.

The older one made it onto the Badminton team and has been enjoying that alongside the school activities he is involved in. But he is becoming a teen, it’s obvious, but at least he is still talking to us and interacting with the family. He is being recognized at school for his participation and dedication to making the school a better place. It’s really nice to see that he is really enjoying school and not getting sucked into some of the negative sides of Junior High school.

We continue to grow and learn together as a family. It’s been a great start to our year!